I wanted to respond to a few private comments I have received regarding my most recent post on the gift of an elephant…
- I love elephants – both the animal and the type of gift they represent. I think they’re great creatures, one of my favorites actually, which is why I pick on them a lot in this blog.
- I am much better at giving, then receiving… but I’m working on it (let the psychoanalysis begin!)
- When you are disadvantaged at receiving gifts (meaning it makes you uncomfortable) being given an elephant is really really hard. (Again… I’m working on it!)
- If you personally want to give someone an elephant I say “Go for it!”
- If you personally want to give me an elephant I say “Go for it!” I have a decent sized backyard I (not huge, not small) that could happily fit one elephant. It needs fertilizing. I think the elephant could really help out! (It’s a bit cold right now though and I don’t have a place in the house to happily keep an elephant…)
- If I offended anyone by suggesting I was unhappy about the offer of elephants I want to apologize. I recognize the gift and the spirit it is given in. I am just uncomfortable with the size of the gift (refer to #2 and #3).
- And finally… please refer back to #4 and #5. I think that’s the most important thing in her. Go give an elephant to someone if it makes you happy!
Thanks again for reading! Anyone received or given an elephant lately??
If I were my own best friend I would tell myself to…
…pause before giving an elephant.
***Have you ever needed help? And help arrived. But it was an elephant. And what you really needed was a monkey or a frog or a ladybug.
It’s hard. I have found myself in a position lately where people keep offering me elephants. Please don’t misunderstand me – the elephant is really really nice. And it’s a huge gesture of kindness. But it’s not really what I need or want.
Elephants are big and they can be messy. And in some ways the elephant just feels like more stress and mess heaped on top of the stress I already have. What I really need is a monkey. But it’s hard to say that to someone who offers you an elephant because you want to be thankful and kind and accept the really big favor they are trying to do for you.
On the flip side of this, I have been guilty of offering elephants as well. I have known people who needed help. And I have been soooo certain I knew exactly what they needed – an elephant of course! I wrapped it up with a big bow and delivered it with a smile. And never thought about what that person might really need or want. Oops.
So I don’t have a clear answer or position for today. Because sometimes you have to accept the elephant to get the monkey you really need. And sometimes you have to establish clear fences and say “no more elephants!” And sometimes you really do need an elephant (but you don’t know it until someone gives you one). So I guess in the end it’s about communication. And really listening and trying to offer help in the way people need it and are able to accept it. And not enforcing your version of help on someone just because you think it’s what they really need.
For my part, I will try my best to only offer elephants to those who need and want them. And the same for monkeys and frogs and ladybugs. Because even though they are smaller, they can still be a bit messy too.
If I were my own best friend I would tell myself to….
…jump in already.
***If this blog were a giant swimming pool I would share with you that I tiptoed into the edge of it about 3 months ago. I got my toes wet and waded in up to my ankles. And there I have sat. The water was a little cold. I hung out on the edge and got used to it. I watched the rest of the pool. Feet in, rest of me out. Not really content, but stuck.
You see, I didn’t know what to write about. I didn’t know what I wanted to say. I was nervous about drawing again. I couldn’t come up with a “great idea.” I couldn’t think of anything that would really change my life or anyone else’s. I pretty much thought anything I posted would suck (Sorry mom, if you’re reading this, I can’t think of a better word than ‘suck’ to describe this.)
So I waited for inspiration. And I waited. And I waited. And the funny thing is… nothing really happened. Except maybe my toes turned into prunes waiting in the water (you know that weird thing that happens when your fingers and toes get all wrinkly when you’ve been in the water for awhile – what’s that all about anyway??).
Finally, this week, I realized I just need to jump in. I miss this space. I miss the interaction with you wonderful people who read this. My writing and drawing are a bit rusty, my mind is a bit dusty, but who cares?!?! You gotta start somewhere!
Is there anything you’ve been putting off? Have you waded into the shallow end and sat watching the deep end with some mix of envy and trepidation while your toes turned into prunes? Care to join me in the deep water??? (cue the sound of Tarzan yelling, see the flash of skin and lycra that goes whizzing by, then nothing but a giant joyous splash…)
I’m back! 🙂